I dreamt about her again. I feel so empty so sad so weak. I just want to break down and cry. It all is so painful to me. I don't know how to end all these. I don't want to be like how I used to be. But I just can't take all these pain that she left me to suffer alone. Its just early in the morning and I'm like that. How am I supposed to live without her. I don't know whether she still reads my blog. I hope that she does! I need her to know how I feel! But I think she won't read anymore. Cause she hates me. Why she just does not understand all these??? After all these, I'm am the one still hanging on still not giving up. And still love her! Worth or not, I don't give a shit at all. All I know is I want her back in my life! I'm scared. What if I see her one day holding hands, standing close to someone else? I know I won't be able to take that. I would rather die. Selfish. Yes I am. Because I love her too much...